Re: A doubt

From the Bhakti List Archives

• July 17, 2001


The way I would interpret it:

1. Our society like many others is a patriarchal. Gotram, as well as 
property etc of the father is taken both by wife and the children.
2. Marriage is considered not just between the individuals for 
sensuous pleasure but for upbringing a family.
3. It is likely that father being the head of the family will insure 
that the customs and traditions including samskaara-s and vedic 
rituals are followed by his sons.  Hence even if he marries other 
casts the traditions and culture is not degraded. Vyaasa was born to 
a fisher-girl, yet ended up as paarashara, as the greatest scholar.

4. A woman marrying a non-brahman will end up with culture that 
belongs to her husband and it is unlikely that she will be able to 
provide the needed environment - spiritual, cultural, educational and 
financial backing needed for the maintenance of the culture she was 
born with.
5. Looking from these angels it is obvious why the rules have been 
laid down that way.
6. These rules follow (Manu) dharma shaastra not really the shruti-s.
-------
Regarding the question of iyer versus iyengar - All are Brahmins - 
Only sagotra is not sanctioned to avoid marrying in the same family. 
Otherwise there are no restrictions.  But from the family traditions 
one has to make sure the families are compatible.  Otherwise one will 
be more unhappy!  Traditionally Iyengars being Srivaishhnavates and 
Iyer being Saivates, one can run into problem in terms of following 
the rituals at home.  Gods may not have a problem but the followers 
of god will end up having problem.  One has to watch out.

Hari Om!
Sadananda


>Dear Srivaishanvas,
>
>	I've been a regular reader of the bhakti group. Couple of days back
>i was hearing yayati's prabhavam by sri krishna premi. There he was
>explaining about marriages. he was telling that a brahmana can marry a
>kshatriya/vaysa/other caste women, but a brahmana woman cannot marry anybody
>other than a brahmana. My question here is two fold. 1) Can some body
>explain why this is so? is this mentioned in the shastras? 2) Then can an
>iyer woman marry an iyengar man & vice versa?
>
>Please excuse if i have unintentionally hurt anybody's feelings.
>
>adiyen,
>Anand.
>
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-- 
K. Sadananda
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Naval Research Laboratory
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           - SrImate rAmAnujAya namaH -
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