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Ramayana in "cyber-language"

From the Bhakti List Archives

sudarshan madabushi • July 31, 1999 


Dear bhakti-list members,

My son who is an avid inter-net surfer wants me to share with you all this 
"new version" of Srimad Ramayanam that is doing the rounds on cyber-space. 
It is a harmless piece of creative story-telling so please accept it as 
such. Please do not take any offence. Children should be encouraged in these 
little games as long as it is also a sort of celebration of 
"bhagavath-vibhavam"

Here is the cyber-version of Ramayana:



>> >LAN, LAN ago, in the SYSTEM of I/O-dhya, there ruled
>> >a PROCESSOR named DOS-rat. Once he EXECUTED a great
>> >sacrifice PROGRAM after  which his queens gave an
>> >OUTPUT of four SUNs - RAM, LSIman,BUG-rat and
>> >SED-rughana. RAM the eldest was a MICROCHIP with
>> >excellent MEMORY. His brothers, however, were only
>> >PERIPHERAL ICs.
>> >
>> >Once when RAM was only 16MB, he married princess
>> >'C'ta. 12 years passed and DOS-rat decided  to INSTAL
>> >RAM as his successor. However, Queen CIE/CAE
>> >(Kayegayee), who was once offered a boon by DOS-rat
>> >for a life saving HELP COMMAND ,took this opportunity
>> >at the instigation of her BIOSed maid (a real
>> >plotter), and insisted that her son Bug-rat be
>> >INSTALLED and that RAM be BOOTED to the forest for 14
>> >years.
>> >
>> >At this cruel and unexpected demand, a SURGE passed
>> >thru DOS-rat and he collapsed, power-less.
>> >
>> >RAM agreed to LOG INTO forest and 'C'ta insisted to
>> >LOGIN with him. LSI-man was also resolved on LOGGING
>> >IN with his brother. The forest was the dwelling of
>> >SPARC-nakha, the TRANSISTOR of RAW-wan, PROCESSOR of
>> >LAN-ka. Attracted by RAM's stature, she proposed that
>> >he marry her. RAM, politely declined.
>> >Perceiving 'C'ta to be the SOURSE CODE of her
>> >distress, she hastened to kill her. Weeping,
>> >SPARC-nakha fled to LAN-ka, where RAW-wan, moved by
>> >TRANSISTOR's plight,approached his uncle MAR-icha.
>> >
>> >MAR-icha
>> >REPROGRAMED himself into the form of a golden stag and
>> >drew RAM deep into the forest. Finally, tired of
>> >chase, RAM shot the  deer, who,with his last
>> >breath,cried out desperately for LSI-man in RAM's
>> >voice. Fooled by this VIRTUAL RAM SOUND,'C'ta urged
>> >LSI-man to his brother's aid. Catching the
>> >opportunity,RAW-wan DELINKED 'C'ta from her LIBRARY
>> >and changed her ROOT DIRECTORY to
>> >LAN-ka.
>> >
>> >RAM and LSI-man started SEARCHING for the missing
>> >'C'ta  all over the  forest. They made friendship with
>> >the forest SYSTEM ADMINISTRATOR SU-greev and his
>> >powerful co-processor Ha-NEUMAN. SU-greev agreed to
>> >help RAM. SU-greev ordered his PROGRAMMERS to use
>> >powerful 'SEARCH' techniques to FIND the missing
>> >'C'ta. His PROGRAMMERS SEARCHED all around the
>> >INTER-NETworked forests. Many tried to 'EXCITE' the
>> >birds and animals
>> >not to forget the 'WEB CRAWLERS'(Insects) and tried to
>> >'INFO SEEK' something about 'C'ta. Some of them even
>> >shouted 'YAA-HOO' but they all ended up with 'NOT
>> >FOUND' MESSAGES.Several other SEARCH techniques proved
>> >useless. Ha-NEUMAN devised a RISKy TECHNOLOGY and
>> >used it to cross the seas at an astonishing CLOCK
>> >SPEED. Soon Ha-NEUMAN DOWNLOADED himself into LAN-ka.
>> >After doing some local SEARCH, Ha-NEUMAN found 'C'ta
>> >weeping under a TREE STRUCTURE.
>> >
>> >Ha-NEUMAN used a LOGIN ID (ring) to identify himself
>> >to 'C'ta. After DECRYPTING THE KEY, 'C'ta believed in
>> >him and asked him to send a STATUS_OK MESSAGE to RAM.
>> >Meanwhile all the raakshasa BUGS around 'C'ta captured
>> >Ha-NEUMAN and tried to DELETE him using
>> >pyro-techniques. But Ha-NEUMAN  managed to spread
>> >chaos by spreading the VIRUS 'Fire'. Ha-NEUMAN happily
>> >pressed ESCAPE from LAN-ka and conveyed all the STATUS
>> >MESSAGES to RAM and SU-greev.

>>
>>RAW-wan decided to take the all powerful RAM head-on and prepared
>>for the battle.One of the RAW-wan's SUN(son) almost DELETED
>> >RAM & LSI-man with a powerful brahma-astra. But
>> >Ha-NEUMAN resorted to some ACTIVE-X gradients and
>> >REBOOTED RAM and LSI-man. RAM used the SOURCE CODE
>> >secrets of RAW-wan and once for all wiped out
>> >RAW-wan's presense on earth.
>>
>> >After the battle, RAM got INSTALLED in I/O-dhya and
>> >spreaded his MICRO SOFT WORKS and other USER FRIENDLY
>> >PROGRAMS to all USERS and every one lived happily everafter.

"mangalam-kOsalEndrAya mahaNeeya guNAthmanE
chakravarti-tanUjAya sarva-bow-mAya mangalam" II

adiyEn dAsAnu-dAsan,
Sudarshan


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